6.29.2015

Ride your mfn bike to mfn work


I rode my bike to work. I got a free mini generic bagel.
Then I rode home. And it rained the whole way. Then I got strep throat.

Mother Nature, ya dirty slut!

6.26.2015

Friday!

Take me back to our favorite place!
... the park was closing.
"We can get one last ride in on Splash Mountain! If we run."
"Ok, but I'm not running."
"Bab! You HAVE to run!!"
We made it just as the red velvet rope, universal symbol for "don't you dare duck under this because shit be closed", clicked shut. 
"Are we too late?" I cried, worried the lack of hustle may have killed the magic.
The teenager looked slightly panicked, asked, "Uh, how many of you are there?"as he peered through the dark to the non-running stragglers in the distance, for whom the velvet rope would not lift. 
"Just two! It's just us! We'll be fast, we promise!"
"Ok, duck under. And HURRY!"
 We whooped and ran through the empty maze and hopped in the last damp seat. The cold breeze from the known and feared excitement ahead plastered doped-up grins to our tired faces. The logomotive plummeted into the tunnel full of robot woodland creatures; Cheers from the workers echoed, so happy another day of making memories was over.
And that was how two best friends caught the last glorious ride of Splash Mountain one summer night not so very long ago.

Thanks for hustling, Bab.

Obergefell vs Hodges

Congratulations Uncle Frank and Aunt Jack!!

6.25.2015

Emoticons say it all

I'm diggin' the new emoticons on Google chats.
There is literally one for every human emotion and they are so cute! 
Who knew little gumdrop heads
would make words obsolete?


6.18.2015

Words of a lady who doesn't have family nearby to gab at

Look at that pile of mulch!!

Unrelated to last post

Say "Hello" to my little friend
she is afraid of turtles and has 7 ticks.



Yes, this is a story to end lunch with

As told by man from China who does not have a filter.

"I ate dog once.

Actually, it was quite sad.  Someone tried to kill him with a bomb that he ate, but it only injured him really bad.  The dog came back to us, it took him a day to die.  Lots of blood.  There wasn't a lot of meat to eat back then."


You can't blame him for eating the dog!  Only for not putting it out of its misery.

(p.s. never google 'dog meat')

6.12.2015

Just like Peter


Don't let the legs fool you, that strong man is ME! JAN! After being deemed "unteachable" I got up on that damned water! I'd like to thank TJ & Jim for smiling a lot, giving ample high-5s, and telling me I was doing good even when I was just floating around. I got up second try, then Peter'd it by immediately panicking & biffing it.

I was a little afraid after I swallowed some of Sloan's lake without having dranken the required amount of coors light (to kill the bacteria) but so far the only thing that has happened is a giant chin zit. I'll take it!

Bad Bab

BAB has been gone all week, and it was national BFF day!
 I tried to call her. It went straight to voicemail.
Happy Friday
 if you can.

6.05.2015

Too much cute

She gets my jokes.
And makes a double chin
only like the cutest thing
on the whole damn planet.

Happy Friday!!!

6.03.2015

It is Wednesday!

Buck up, you're almost there!

6.01.2015

Book Club!

The long awaited book club was a success, even though one of us didn't read the book until that very morning, and we ate entirely too much kettle corn, and the book I picked was gay. (I can use that adjective because the main characters were two boys in love)

I am one step closer to becoming Oprah!!!