lunch break entertainment

Poor little nanner jumped off the diving board yesterday and about drowned himself. The lifeguard dove in and fished him out just fine. This was right after all the kids waiting in line behind him had shouted, "Do something cool!"


Expletives at Barnes and Noble

punk kid: "Excuse me, can you pull on this piece of gum?"
jan: "What's it going to do to me?"
  pulls gum
jan: "It zapped me!"
  kids laugh and run away

A few minutes later jan admits the whole truth, "That thing was fucking zappy!"

US v. Germany

Time to dust off the ol' propaganda posters!
Still relevant!

I wonder who Robbie will root for,
what with her Bratwurst heritage
and willingness to assemble?
Yay USA!



"Do you sell iced coffee?"
"Do you sell coffee?"
"Ok, great. I'll take a cup of coffee with cream, and a cup of ice."
"... That'll be $1.25, sir."

easter bunnies

Judging by her actions last weekend, she's going to dip this bunny in chocolate and devour the entire thing.

You won't even have to double dare her.


Robyn's taking me to the World Cup!

Holy schnikies!  I'll be looking like this the whole time, so watch carefully.

It's easier to just tell people you play soccer so if anyone asks, I'm a full-back.

See ya in a couple weeks, Goooooaaaaallllll!!!!!!!!!!!!


Happy Days

Happy birthday shout out to my sister Amy.
She's a hell of a good mom to the cutest baby
in the world.
I love her because she has her cake
and sometimes eats it for breakfast, too.


a father's advice

"I have 3 primal fears:
 and  Bears.
And your mother."


"These are our DRESS sneakers!"

JAN and I will fight for the right to wear dress-up sneakers and so will Ellen.

Which is probably why assumptions are sometimes made.


Happy Friday!

Here's to a good weekend of 
peeing in pools with your 
favorite peeps.



Un-Happiest Place on Earth: the highway going past this exit

Can you believe we just drove on by?
There are very few people I would let torture me
like this, so my hubsband should feel honored
I only asked, "Are you SURE you dont want to go? 
Mickey lets us stay until midnight!
I'll buy you a churro!" about 5x.
Give or take.

It felt so un-American.


Reason #804 why JAN's my BFFL

She saved the Reese's candies from her Easter basket for me and I get to eat one every time I go over to her house!  


I'm sensitive, alright?

Don't tease me about the bundles of "change holders" I'm going to end up with because of my crappy pottery skills.  It hits a nerve I can't recover from.