And the horse you rode in on.

Remember that part in Pretty Woman where she is flossing the strawberry seeds out of her teeth and wants a little privacy in the bathroom but he comes in, poised for a nipple tweak and thinks she is hiding drugs? And then he is all, "No way girlfriend! No drugs in this house!" like some sort of volunteer morality police. And then 15 years later you have the brain power to analyze and you're all like, "He was paying that woman to have sex with him... and ends up being the hero... even though she had never seen that episode of I Love Lucy but instead of letting her just watch it, he makes her give him a b.j.!" (Which, even when you were 13, you thought was super rude). And then you have to consciously unfurrow your brow.

And not think about how you wish you were rewatching it on the couch with your mom.

Plants as tall as your friend!

She's one who isn't afraid of bears, you want JAN on your team.

Sandwich artist needs to expand his palate.

The Subway guy didn't know what muenster cheese is!  

  Then he turned down Swiss so I went for provolone.

Due to farm work,

I was unable to email jan back :(

Blue skies

And a man and his dog.

Colorado, my oh my.

#7

"Of course it is happening in your head, Harry,

but why on earth should that mean 
that it is not real?"

                - A.P.W.B.D.

Almost a year after I started, 

the adventure is over.

I milked it by reading only on the lightrail

or at lunchtime, finishing last night.

TJ knew to respect the magnitude 

and let me have my weepy cry time.

Sometimes, I wonder if the 

seventh book is not my most favorite

of all.

Siiiiiiiiiiiiigh.

Zen & Garden

My fingers hurt!

Somebody pulled landscaping duty.

The Internet: helping the world survive one terrible Monday after another

Friday!

I hope one day you find

the littlest cherub sleeping

 so perfectly in your bed.

Until then,

happy Friiiiday!

Unlike those jerk geese,

I appreciate not having to worry about territorial bunny attacks.

Shreddin'

I believe it is my privilege - NAY - duty to test the limits of the paper shredder at work. Oh yes, there are limits. Oh yes...

It's something you know, but you also don't know

Those love notes don't get higher because trees grow out at the base and up from the top.  

But you won't really remember that when you shout it out to a car full of people over and again until TJ kindly corrects your blunder.  

(you being the person who has a master's in horticulture) 

My baby's all grown up!

"I would rather give up candy than give up wine."  

           ~ jan 

Pluto for Planethood!

I think we all owe Pluto an apology, preferably read in the voice of Stephen Hawking. For though it may be tiny, it is pretty b.a.

You have always been a planet in our hearts, Pluto!

Friday!

The best way to cherish a beer

at Hogshead is to nap 

during the afternoon rains

then come back when the crowds

have fled

and the light is golden

and magic seems
 certain.

Luxurious fog!

NO.  It's essence of burning maple forest drifting in from Canada :(

Tiny Quotes

[Jan & Bab listening to the Chizzies converse, a favorite form of entertainment]

"What did you write back to her?"
"I didn't know what to say, so I sent her the emoji of a cat eating a donut."
"...And what meaning, specifically, did you wish to convey?"
"I dunno. I just wanted to shut her up."

This could be true

Bill Clinton sent his first email while he was POTUS from the White House.


It was a chain mail that threatened 7 years of bad luck if he didn't forward it to 10 friends.

Boo.

The ONLY way I can possibly fathom how it went down:

"You know, in real life I'm a doctor, sort of. Take these pills."
"Mmm, ok!"

..............

I can't believe I will have to warn my daughter never to go into a secret lair alone with a man wearing a velvet robe, who offers you pills and keeps nodding in approval as you drink your drinks and keeps asking if you feel sleepy yet. Had those women not seen every cartoon villian ever created? Was it the expensive sweaters that fooled them into a sense of security?

Tired, Hungry, and Poor

We may be all of those things

and also extremely bug-bitten

and possibly poison-ivy'd

after spending the weekend in the woods,

but where else are you going

to have a dance party in an army tent?

America, that's where.

She is a beautiful lady.

The Cat's Meow

Today

while technically being

a Thursday

is a Friday!

Let us

frolic!!!

Good grief

I don't understand the marketing behind using minions, characters famous for their idiocy and love of guns loaded with fart musk and lack of linguistic mastery, to create sentimental memes. But, a lot of people keep sharing the sap, so what do I know.

No, I DO know. People are chumps. 75,014 people.