Sometimes lunchtime "pregnancy yoga" is when you nap under your desk & feel your bebé doin' kickies.


The monkey's your uncle.

Remember how sometimes you fall asleep but jolt-freak yourself awake because you feel like you are falling & some scientists believe that's because your evolved cells are remembering back to a time when you were a monkey & were falling out of a tree?


Good one, "science."

But, how do you explain my lack of instinct to fling my own poop when I am mad?



"I can't believe there's a baby 
in your belly.
Remember in Iceland,
when that's all we wanted?"


Gotta love me!

21 weeks! Baby takes a little sip of the bathtub water (amniotic fluid) every day, just to practice swallowing! I can feel when it kicks and somersaults and curls up in a ball. I am in love thinking of Baby just hangin out in there, all like:



"That Disney movie where Robin Hood is a fox. When you were little, did you think he was handsome? And then, like, your crotch gets a headache?"
- Kimmy Schmidt


Same dude, everybody.

We were shocked that we had to explain this to Toni B (being that he's her most favorite actor out there).
Might I add that he is a Babe.

Her paraphrased words, "You have to see Marigold Hotel and, just remember, it is beauuutifull."

Meet Don Cheagle

My would-be chihuahua-beagle mix.


I went home sick because my sinus pressure is making my teeth hurt & theraflu is off limits when you have a tiny human in your belly.

"Bob Ross, he was my uncle."
[- 1996 conversation with 5th grade classmate whose uncle very well could have been Bob Ross, but I wasn't about to be hearin' any of that jazz.]


You're lucky I'm already pregnant.

Remember last night
when it was bedtime
but you let us stay up late
to watch videos 
of the baby
 pygmy hippo?
I was so in love with you
& the way you giggled
when it walked or laid down or
ate hay
& confessed to me,
"It's TOO cute."



By a wonderful turn of events wherein Bab's boyfriend gets the exact day of her birth wrong, I got to spend the for-real birth day with Bab yet again! 10 years running. Like Dwayne The Rock Johnson, true love can't stop won't stop.
Happy Birthday, Beebz! Thanks for letting me sip your boozy drink.



If the world seems a little much right now, just know that somewhere out there GW is painting portraits. And they are quite wonderful.

He was an idiot sometimes,
but he wasn't a trumpeting asshole.